Think of something wise, write it down here


"Replying "The Very Same!" when your name is called may seem like a good idea, it in fact just make you look a twat"

The very same indeed.

Divorce comes from the Latin word meaning to rip a man's genitals out through his wallet.

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. Opera is exactly the same as it used to be, that is what is wrong with it.

Those are jokes, not words of wisdom

When eating pizza, leave some, go to bed and when your body wakes up and memories of last night arise, you will realise YOU HAVE PIZZA TO EAT, this is the best god damn feeling in the world, I would forfeit my birthday for the surprise of pizza to eat in the morning.

When urinating in to a toilet with a seat that tends to fall down by itself when put up, do not kneel on the floor and aim for the water because the toilet seat will crush your cock.

Post in a thread that will get ninja'd, get Techonians.

......

I was going to say...

"If you feel ill, have a warm shower".... Best feeling in the whole god damned world

"You should NOT get involved, EVER ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever "

"Don't split up and go down separate unconnected paths where you'll obvious die one by one you fools!"

If you think youre cool, tell youre mum

random encounters are still lame, even after 80's rpgs, thanks Valve

If at first you dont succedd destroy any evidence that you were there or that you tried

+1 xD

If at first you don't succeed, you fail, and the test shall be terminated. Alternatively, if at first you don't succeed, sky diving isn't for you.
Never argue with an idiot- they drag you down to their level. and then can beat you with their experience.
Always forgive your enemies- nothing annoys them as much as that.
If you can't fix your car brakes, make your horn louder.
When you're right, no-one remembers. When you're wrong, no-one forgets.
Join the Army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
Everyone makes mistakes- the trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Those should keep you wise.

Fix'd (the full quote has much more meaning)

If it hurts, all you need to do is poke it more.

When someone talks to God, it is religion. When God talks to someone, it is psychosis.

Remember, it's not paranoia if someone really is out to get you.

"Ask and you shall receive"

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

The truth begins in lies. (think about it)

Life was better when you were younger, never forget that.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes.